To hear some people talk you would think my Grandad is some sort of superhero. Apparently when uncle Dan was a baby he fell off the sofa and Grandad caught him on his foot and saved the day. Well let me tell you what happened yesterday. I was playing on G-Ma's bed and fell backwards, did he catch me? No he did not, he just lay there and watched. I banged my head on the radiator and it hurt. Today at the park he made me cry because he wouldn't let me play on the slide on my own in case I fell off. If he were truly a superhero he could freeze time and catch me before I hit the floor.
The old man's a fraud I tell you.
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