What a weekend!

Where do I start with this weekend?
Firstly I saw G-Ma, always a pleasure. Of course If G-Ma is around the daft one is always around somewhere. On Saturday mum and dad put me in my magical chair, (I swear to you its magic, they strap me in, I have 40 winks and when I wake up I am nowhere near where we were when I dozed off. I swear it happens every single time they put me in this seat.) anyway, on Saturday they put me in my chair, when I woke up I had no idea where I was, I think I may have seen two of the women that were there somewhere before, but I couldn't swear to it. It turns out we were at a family get together, because one of them two women is having a baby. Some of them sounded like that nice man at the shop down the road, some of the others sounded like grandad. G-Ma got there a bit later and started playing with me. Then some more people I knew got there, Aunt Sam, Molly and Oscar, what a relief. No sign of clicker-man, I swear he does my head in with his constant noise, how G-Ma hasn't done him in yet is beyond me.
I was playing with Molly and Oscar when mum announced she was leaving me and going to a party with dad.
I see, I get the picture. Sick of looking after me are we? Drive you to drink do I? And what in heavens name is a Kebab?
Oh yeah while I'm having a moan, I heard a whisper this weekend you are selling me to someone on TV for £250. What's going on? get yourself sorted you pair or I'm off to live with G-Ma and the nut job.